To Establish Positive Relationship with Children
To create a family atmosphere full of love and happiness for children to grow up, it is undoubtedly the ultimate wish for most parents. Unfortunately, the Hong Kong society is highly competitive and it has forced many working-class parents to spend most of their time in career instead of family. The responsibility of looking after their children has then slipped onto the shoulder of the grandparents or domestic helpers. As a result, insufficient communication and company would easily alienate children from their parents. The story of Wai Fong is a representative portrayal of many Hong Kong families.
Divorced and raising her daughter by herself; huge pressure from personal and working life
Divorced not long after marriage, Wai Fong had to raise her daughter Yan at her own strength. As the only financial income source, the unbearable pressure from both work and family nearly suffocated Wai Fong. While Wai Fong was hitting the rock bottom emotionally, Yan was going through her rebellious period and was often complained by teachers at school. Frequent conflicts at that time between the mother and daughter had severely put their relationship in crisis.
Wai Fong confessed that, ‘I felt really bad and unable to control myself but yelled at Yan whenever I saw her. I suffered from insomnia and negative thoughts emerged, and even delusion occasionally.’
The constant strained relationship between her and her daughter had become the major source of Wai Fong’s stress. What was worse, Wai Fong’s negative emotions had made normal communication with Yan nearly impossible and thus their relationship was further deteriorated. Such vicious circle had pushed Wai Fong to the brink of collapse. Eventually, she determined to seek professional assistance from public psychiatric hospital. Wai Fong was diagnosed depression.
Recovery under family support
Through a period of medication, Wai Fong had gradually recovered from her sickness. However, without ameliorating the relationship with her daughter, Wai Fong was still mentally unstable. Introduced by her doctor, Wai Fong and Yan had joined in the ‘HKJC Hope of Family Project’ by New Life Psychiatric Rehabilitation Association. Taking part in the diversified group activities, Wai Fong managed to discover the other side of her daughter. With a lot of participation and interaction of family members and stressing personal advantages, the project aimed to deepen the understanding of the patients’ families and themselves to their mental illness situation. The project had helped many families regain hope to build positive relationships within.
Wai Fong and Yan’s got along better and better after the project, and Wai Fong’s emotion showed better stability under the support of her daughter.
Offering friendly accompany as fellow walker
After the completion of the project, Wai Fong decided to join the new ‘Jockey Club Embracing H.O.P.E.S. Project’ as a Family Peer Support Worker. Her job was to accompany the project participant as a Peer Support Worker, to share her recovery experience and offer necessary assistance in order to encourage their rehabilitation.
From the first person angle, Wai Fong had not only proved the possibility of full recovery from mental illness, but also unselfishly shared her knowledge and techniques in maintaining physical and mental health to all participants. To be a real Peer Support Worker, Wai Fong sincerely comprehends the situation of the patients and learns to embrace them without any judgment.
As she expressed, ‘I am now able to have good communication with my daughter. Therefore, I wish my personal experience is helpful to prove the importance of better family relationship to mental rehabilitation.’
For more details of Recovery Information, please Click here
For more details of ‘HKJC Hope of Family Project’, please Click here